I have come to terms with the truth: my three year is obsessed with Santa. I have not pushed it or encouraged it, but he is completely enthralled with the guy in the red suit. When I ask him the question, "Why do we celebrate Christmas?" The answer no matter how hard I try is "Santa brings presents." And I have to admit the magic and fun of Santa is appealing to me as well. I find it hard to let go of that part of Christmas even with my own personal convictions battling. We're trying to find a balance.
In my quest to be the best Godly mom I can be, I want to teach the real meaning of Christmas and have Christ be the number one focus. I have to admit I am feeling a little overwhelmed with HOW DO I DO THIS.
My quest of the day: Would Jesus let Santa come down his chimney?
Answer: Maybe only if God gets the glory.
Disclaimer: This is going to be a toughie--controversial and an ever changing/reevaluating topic in my house!!! I would love to hear how other Christians balance all this while operating with the premise that the chief end of man is to glorify God and enjoy Him forever.
My Explanation: I want my children to grow up knowing that "Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows." James 1:17.
Every good gift includes: presents under a tree, good grades, and a perfect football pass. I want my Father to be in the spotlight in our home.
So Michael and I have talked about how can we do this. We have decided this year we will not talk much about Santa, but Santa is invited to come to our house. The presents will not be based on whether our children were naughty or nice because we know our hope is in undeserved GRACE. We'll leave cookies for the jolly ole elf, but Santa might only leave one thing for each child. And before we touch, open, or play with the toys on Christmas morning, we will pray and thank God for giving us all the good and perfect gifts under our tree. We will make sure that we will give credit where credit is due.
We will strive to spend our time and energy focusing on Jesus's birthday. We will focus on Nativity crafts and activities. We will act out the Nativity story with family and friends. We will give Jesus gifts every year at Jesus's birthday party. Our presents will be something dedicated to God like surrendering a bad habit or dedicating ourselves to a new discipline. We'll write them down on balloons and send them off to heaven. And of course Jesus will get his cake.
I know children are only little for a short time, and I don't want to steal the Christmas magic we all treasure from our own childhoods. But teaching God's truth and shaping their little hearts is just as short and precious of a time. I will strive to store up my treasures in heaven by being intentional about eternal things.
I know it's a lot, but I'd love to hear what you do in your family about Santa.
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Hi Jenna, I can't help but comment on this post because it's something that John and I struggled with years ago when Kyle was little. We come from a different perspective because we aren't religious, but we also didn't feel comfortable actively lying to our children about where presents come from. Of course, Kyle was mesmerized with Santa anyway, even though we hadn't talked about him. We decided what would work for our family was having Santa bring one small gift each year. We talk about how the holidays are a time to celebrate the love and bonds of our families and to personally thank those who picked out our presents for us. We do leave cookies for Santa, but again, we use this as a time to bond as a family while making cookies. When Kyle was 6, he approached us with quetions about Santa's true existence. We told him the truth then, and he now enjoys carrying on a little bit of the magic with his sister. I think you and Michael can definitely keep the focus of the holiday on Jesus for your boys but let them have a little Santa, too.
ReplyDeleteHi Jenna,
ReplyDeleteFortunately for us, Lila hasn't been that enamored with Santa so we haven't gotten too many questions. We ask things like "whose birthday are we celebrating at Christmas?" - there is only one answer to that and it isn't Santa so that helps keep the focus on Jesus. Just the other night in the car, we were talking with Lila about what kind of gifts we could give Jesus (sharing, being kind, etc.) When she has asked about Santa, we have said that Santa is make-believe and some people enjoy pretending that he brings gifts at Christmas but that we know it is really about Jesus' birthday. Lila seems perfectly content knowing Santa is pretend just like a Disney princess is pretend. We'll see if that continues next year :) I think the important thing is to make sure Christ is the main focus like you said - eventually they will figure out on their own that Santa isn't real - and I don't think they will care then because they will know that Jesus is real and he is the reason we celebrate.
I have been thinking about this some, too. This is really the first year Jackson has really been old enough to understand what a special and fun time of the year this is. The most important thing for him to realize is that it is Jesus' birthday...so at home I want to talk about, read about, and create things that focus on the birth of Jesus. I want to make Christmas about our Savior's birthday and being together as a family. We will see how it goes! Love reading and hearing about how other people celebrate Christmas in their homes.
ReplyDeleteOur strategy so far is a lot like Colette described, but we're trying to add one more facet: Santa Claus is based on a real person, Saint Nicholas, who really lived, and who gave gifts to others because he loved Jesus. Some good friends of ours celebrate Saint Nicholas day, and I think learning about him will help our curious little guy understand why there's so much fuss about Santa. I don't know if we'll gifts from Santa or not...but our next challenge will be to teach him how not to ruin the illusion for other kids! I'm not sure what else we're going to do this year, but it has been fun so far, as he's at such a great age for things like helping decorate the tree. :)
ReplyDeleteI'd love to read more about your ideas on these topics, though, as everything seems less clear to me now that we have kids! ;) Of course I totally agree...we want God to be glorified, so if we can make Jesus the center of Christmas, and have fun with stories about snowmen, elves, and flying reindeer, great!
I experienced being upset that I was lied to when I discovered Santa wasn't real. Yes, I was one of those children. Johan's family, as far as I know, didn't have anything to do with Santa. We chose to tell our kids the truth. Although, we sure have enjoyed some of the movies that have santa and rudolph. We remind them that most of what they see on the TV is just a fun story. The hardest part for us right now, is the fact that our oldest son is old enough to ruin it for other kids. I have friends who are so die-hard into Santa with their kids, so I have to have the talk and threaten them pretty severely that they may not discuss it with other kids because other families make their own choices, therefore other kids think Santa is real. We don't give any gifts from Santa. We give each child three gifts (in addition to stocking) because that's how many gifts were given to Jesus. We have a birthday cake for Jesus, sing the Happy Birthday song to Him, read the story of His birth, sing Christmas (I would say they are mainly the songs that worship Him). We REALLY focus hard on Jesus' birthday. As the kids get older we will give Jesus our own gift (a song of worship, a new commitment, anything that would be a gift to Him). Johan's family did this and it's so cool. Anyway, there are so many things to do that focus everything on Jesus!
ReplyDeleteI have enjoyed all the comments and emails about this topic. I appreciate your time and sharing what your families do. We still haven't decided how we are going to do this, but I have a lot to think about now. I wish wish wish I could do both: Have a make believe Santa Christmas and have a Happy Birthday Jesus Day. When the church tried to cover up the pagan winter holiday with Jesus's birthday, it made Dec. 25 extremely complicated for people trying to do Santa and Jesus. I think we are going to try to do both but spread them out. Santa might come a week earlier to our house or something.
ReplyDeleteHere's an email comment I got from someone who is know a grandma.
ReplyDeleteIt's hard to do any balancing act. I tried to make sure my kids knew about Jesus' birth and the importance of Christmas. Not sure what they remember about it. Santa was always everywhere. Christmas is such a magical time of the year. The important thing is teaching about Jesus every opportunity that arises in everyday life, not just at Christmas. They are so young now and I just love that magical feeling that Santa gives. Remember the Saint Nicholes story too.
You can give to Angel Trees or Children's (orphan) homes or maybe homeless people at Christmas to teach the Giving of Christmas ( As Christ teaches us). All children do not get tons of gifts so it helps even at a young age to teach sharing to your young ones. As they grow older you give more of Jesus and less of Santa as they are able to absorb it. I loved the Jesus Birthday Party we had at Church. You had to really think about what gift you were going to give Jesus. It was very meaningful to put our sealed letters(stating what we were going to do or give up for Jesus's gift) in the crib with the baby Jesus (a doll ) then all the letters were burned outside in a metal can and no one knew but you and Jesus what the letter said. Even young children will remember this ritual (whether a fire or balloons) .